The Worst Gold Diggers Author – Dawson is a pig that can’t even see his down there business because of his huge gut from his alcoholic tendencies that refrain him from “pleasing ladies”. D is too busy wondering where his bumps have gone both the white kind and itchy types. His wife Shelby Publicover is a batri ting and he knows it that’s why he keeps her around while he fails other women. Dawson Dockstater is the human form of a c0ckroach. Beware ladies he may try to pipe your thighs with his tictac.